Journalism's Corporate Sponsors | May 22, 2019 Act 2 | Full Frontal on TBS

Journalism's Corporate Sponsors | May 22, 2019 Act 2 | Full Frontal on TBS

for years we've known that newspapers are an endangered species even our best efforts to breed them in captivity have done little to reverse the crisis the poor bastards just refused to fuck and I'm sad to report we are losing another one an outpouring of support building for employees of the times-picayune after learning that the iconic New Orleans newspaper would be no more many storied journalists and staff will be losing their jobs many businesses are reaching out to those employees offering up any new positions even free food be careful though one second you're just feeding stray journalists and the next you've adopted 12 and you're the journalist lady using food to deal with bad news feels very New Orleans but you probably shouldn't deliver bad news through food which is exactly what the newspaper The Advocate did when they announced their merger with The Times Picayune via Baked Alaska featuring the logos of the newly merged papers and if that weren't insensitive enough they used the laid-off workers contracts to light the cake The Times Picayune is just the latest of many casualties in the news industry the past year has seen major job losses at organizations like the New York Daily News Gannett McClatchy and Reuters and things are just as bad online with layoffs hitting outlets like The Huffington Post Vox Mike BuzzFeed and vice never thought I'd feel bad for the people at vice but they had to lay off their entire Washington bureau of white rappers these digital outlets were supposed to survive the print media industries collapse but it turns out everyone is struggling part of the problem is the way the ad model is changing advertisers have always been a prime source of funding for journalism ever since the first newspaper ad in 1704 for Thaddeus McGillicuddy's extra-strength genital leeches the bloodletting you need the suction you crave but in recent years sponsors have turned away from print advertising in favor of digital ads and you can see why thanks to the Internet companies can now buy digital ads that are carefully targeted at their exact desired audience who will never see the ads because everyone uses ad blockers it's the perfect model digital advertising has been bad for print media but it's also not that great for web media since most online advertising is sold by Google and Facebook so reporters knock themselves out finding stories doing research cultivating sources sometimes even risking their lives and they mainly end up generating revenue for this sleep paralysis apparition and that's not even the worst thing this tall glass of milk has done to destroy journalism Facebook is being sued by a group of advertisers for not disclosing a problem with a key ad metric for more than a year the suit claims Facebook misled advertisers by overestimating how much the user spent watching video ads Facebook convinced all these news sites that people love watching videos instead of reading on their phone but they knew that wasn't true no one likes watching video news on their phone even you don't which is why you're reading this summary online instead of watching the embedded video Facebook's pivot to video bullshit costs countless jobs at news sites and some of those sites never recovered it's the worst thing Facebook has done since I'm sorry wait what was the last good thing Facebook meanwhile back in the world of old media hedge funds are buying up newspapers and stripping them for parts slashing jobs and selling off the papers buildings for quick profits take the Denver Post after they were bought by Alden global capital their newsroom went from this to this even worse they also found out via cake and it was a goddamn fucking fruitcake sure not all newspapers are suffering these days the New York Times has seen huge growth in digital subscribers and the Washington Post was bought by Amazon owner Jeff Bezos who will always have plenty of money to keep the newspaper afloat just as long as you're too embarrassed to buy your squatty potty in ferret cialis at an actual store but most news organizations aren't lucky enough to have a dildo shaped sugar-daddy to pay all their bills we are forcing the lifeblood of democracy to rely on the whims of power-hungry zillionaires this full-frontal anti-capitalist rant is brought to you by Fuddruckers serving dead cows on bread since 1979 the demands for news is insatiable but no one wants to pay for the supply so what can we do I mean for one thing hedge funds can take a break and destroy some other businesses I suggest build-a-bear those jerks wouldn't even let me put a heart in my bear after I went through all the trouble to bring one in from home and Mark Zuckerberg you could probably save all of journalism with just a portion of your hoodie budget it's the least you can do after sucking up ad revenue pivoting new sites into oblivion spreading fake news and showing me that the wife of a guy I used to date has abs and it's fine but how obvious ok I'm fine but like fuck her as for the rest of us we have to stop taking journalism for granted it is super important after all without journalism there'd be no occupation for all the career-driven but unlucky in love romantic comedy characters played by Kate Hudson Jennifer Garner Drew Barrymore and Hathaway Rachel McAdams drew Barrymore Julia Roberts Renee Zellweger Jennifer Aniston Sarah Jessica Parker Jennifer Aniston Katherine Heigl meg Ryan meg Ryan Katherine Heigl and whoever the fuck the straight to Netflix version of Amy Adams and a Christmas Prince is oh and also journalism makes a free society possible so I guess that's important too we'll be right back after these words from Fuddruckers [Applause] you you

Posts created 22457

47 thoughts on “Journalism's Corporate Sponsors | May 22, 2019 Act 2 | Full Frontal on TBS

  1. Freedom of the Press is Integral to the Survival of Democracy. The Printed Press allows all people to attain factual information. Journalism is our Freedoms Survival! God I really hope you comprehend it!

  2. Why is this trash showing up on my feed? Unfortunately for you samantha b, I don't have an IQ of 12 like most of your viewers

  3. I wonder who owns TBS the Capitalist Company paying you. I wonder who sponsors this show which makes me wonder who this is payed for. Thanks Canada, you are so witty and funzor.

  4. Here at our Corporate Media outlet we don;t like Corporations or Media Outlets.
    Communism now State enforced homosexuality.

  5. The problem with many female comedians is their overly exaggerated emphasis and deliveries. They come on like teachers talking to students rather than just hanging out with the gang.

  6. #SamanthaBee is just awful.

    Hey #SamanthaBee what do YOU have to do/sacrifice to get YOUR nationally televised show?πŸ”ΊοΈβš οΈπŸ”»

  7. Yea lets complain about the thing that has allowed for best standards of living since ever. Socialism = collectivism = your brought down to the level of the weakest link in society. Ill keep my capitalism = individualism and the only factor of my success is how much i work for it.

  8. The BEST! I knew America was still here, I just knew it! This lady has almost as many subscribers as all three major news outlets. I have to stop and continue laughing and laughing and laughing


  10. In hindsight, not terribly surprising. We've set up an information superhighway where news can be shared freely.

    News traditionally charged for the dissemination of information and so the cheaper option won. The difference being that one was held to standards and laws, whereas the other spews forth literally anything and everything, and no one can be held accountable.

    I am shocked that the general public isn't better informed. Shocked!

  11. Samatha Bee is pure trash and not funny. Nothing more annoying than a Canadian with dual citizenships giving their opinion on what America needs to change

  12. Maybe if traditional journalism improved it's journalistic integrity it would get more support. People are going to underdogs and support them directly and I can't blame them

  13. Congratulations sam on your failing show. One show per week between sam and her writers, they cannot even be funny for 6 seconds

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Begin typing your search term above and press enter to search. Press ESC to cancel.

Back To Top