The Realest Fake News Show Ever | The Nib : Ep. 110 | Topic

The Realest Fake News Show Ever | The Nib : Ep. 110 | Topic

Today we’re forgiving all student debt and making college totally free. No American will ever pay for an education again! REPORTERS: MR. PRESIDENT! MR PRESIDENT! *cameras flash* BUFFY: HI-YA! GIRL: Ugh! The news is so boring now. Let’s watch the new season of Buffy! BOY: I’m so glad it’s back. I sure love 2017. GIRL: Ahhh…It’s the best! Oh, no! OPERATOR: Times up lady! Outta clams, you gotta scram. GILLIGAN: Gosh Skipper, do you think they’ll ever find us? TRUMP: Why didn’t Obama “rescue” (save) castaways on that uncharted desert isle? SAD! *tweet swish* *laughter from TV* REPORTERS: OVER HERE PLEASE! SARAH! COULD YOU LOOK!? HEY SARAH! OVER HERE! REPORTER (off-screen): Sarah, now, is the president sitting around all morning watching TV? REPORTER (off-screen): Sarah, now, is the president sitting around all morning watching TV?
SARAH HUCKABEE: Ugh…Shut up! SARAH HUCKABEE: Ugh…Shut up! The president cares about the plight of ALL castaways! Now, NEXT QUESTION. PAUL RYAN: If there were a group of shipwrecked, white civilians, every effort should have been made to find them, something the Obama administration IGNORED! DR. VON PHILBERT: Und so you see, there are an infinite number of parallel universes, SEAN HANNITY: So it’s possible that in one of these realities, Gilligan’s Island IS happening! So Trump was right. *The Penguin laughing* TRUMP: Carnage in Gotham! Obama ignored “The Penguin” (see tape) but I will catch him. Enjoy! REPORTERS: SARAH! OVER HERE! PLEASE! QUESTION! REPORTERS: SARAH! OVER HERE! PLEASE! QUESTION!
HUCKABEE: Uggghhhh… HUCKABEE: Uggghhhh… HOST: Sunday Hot Takes! Where opinions are like assholes, we’ve got one each. HOST: This week on Sunday Hot Takes, the wage gap between men and women, is it really such a bad thing? Jill, you hate other women, start us off with something awful. JILL: Well I’m wealthy and I’m doing just fine! I am sorry feminists are too ugly to get a raise. Try leaning in, or being born rich. That’s an option! HOST: Scorching! Ayoni, you’re some scammy self-help author on this subject. Melt my face with some hot knowledge. AYONI: Women should focus less on being paid ‘MONEY’ and more on channeling their INNER GLOW to create wealth that’s inside your head! You would know this if you bought my book. HOST: Huh! A take so hot, it’s cold! Don? Don wake up will ya? Quick! We need a take! DON: Male and female, the two genders. These kids, they’ve got 40 genders. I like two, traditional. HOST: Not exactly what we’re talking about, but I like it. Don! I think it’s time for you to get a raise! Here you go. And a little for daddy… Next up, is child support biased against men who happen to be famous TV hosts? I definitely think so! TRUMP: (mumbling) TRUMP: (mumbling)
CONWAY: Sir, we need you to sign off on the-sir? Sir! TRUMP: (mumbling) TV: ♫ Ba-ba-ba-ba-baaaaa the Matress King! ♫ TV: ♫ Ba-ba-ba-ba-baaaaa the Matress King! ♫
AIDES: Psst! Hey! Sir? Sir! TV: ♫ Ba-ba-ba-ba-baaaaa the Matress King! ♫ TRUMP: (singing) Hmm…hmm…the Mattress King! TRUMP: (singing) Hmm…hmm…the Mattress King!
AIDES: Important president stuff for you to do. TRUMP: (singing) Hmm…hmm…the Mattress King! AIDE: What do we have to do to get this guy’s attention? AIDE #2: Hmm… *ding* *construction noises* *grunts* *phone beeps* *phone beeps*
Alright people, its show time! Get this cleaned up! Alright people, its show time! Get this cleaned up! TRUMP: That’s a good mention… (mumbling) TRUMP: That’s a good mention… (mumbling)
KUSHNER: Okay phone time is over! KUSHNER: Okay phone time is over! It’s TV time now, sir. ‘HOST’: So Ms. Conway, Trump has been all but silent on- CONWAY: Okay, that is fake news! Our VERY active president will be signing the SYRIA THING we talked about first thing tomorrow morning. ‘HOST’: Oh no! We don’t want him to! TRUMP: Oh hey they’re talking about me, this is good! Let’s see how unfair MSNBC, is being, to Trump. FAKE JOE: As a shill for Hillary Clinton, The least crooked person ever, I’d hate it for the president to answer important emails from his aides! TRUMP: I’ll answer them all! Okay? Even the ones from Groupon. People say to me, that I write the best emails, believe me! ‘HOST’: This is Fox news. I SAID, THIS. *kick* IS. *kick* FOX. *kick* NEWS. *kick* Ahem! And so the president plans to stay off Twitter tomorrow, is that right? AIDE #2: This president is SO smart, he doesn’t need Twitter! TRUMP: I’ll stay off tomorrow. I thought of that myself. ‘HOST’: Oh boy! *yawns* It’s getting late! AIDE #2: It sure is! It’s time for all big boys to brush their teeth, and get ready for bed. *yawn* *male horror scream**fog horn* *smacks lips* *teeth brushing * *humming* TRUMP: Goodnight TV. *humming* ‘HOST’: Goodnight, sir- I mean, uhh and now for a commercial break. TRUMP: Goodnight, commercial. *exhausted sighs* CONWAY: Great job, everyone! AIDE #1: I guess we just do that every day for three and a half years. *groaning* MAN: Wow thanks for the great surgery! NURSE: No problem. Your bill is in the mail. *nurses laughing* Just kidding. We all know healthcare is free in 2017. Now just sit back and watch the new season of Buffy. TRUMP: ABSOLUTELY SPECTACULAR! *babble* *man gasps* *glitch noises* *monkey noises and Trump talking* *white noise static* MAN: Ugh. I didn’t ask to be in a political satire. OPERATOR: None of us did kid. Tough noogies. No refunds.

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100 thoughts on “The Realest Fake News Show Ever | The Nib : Ep. 110 | Topic

  1. ๐Ÿคฃ๐Ÿ˜€๐Ÿ˜€๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚

  2. I donโ€™t hate liberals but I donโ€™t understand how liberals think theyโ€™re entitled to everything they want

  3. If I were president I wouldn't have a Twitter,Facebook, Snapchat,or Instagram I would have a team do the social media for me and also why can't we boys/girls-Women/Men get along?Oh yeah I forgot we think different!!

  4. Best episode so far, mostly bcuz that fucking boring ass lesbo isn't interrupting with vapid non-funny political shit – just let the funny and the political satire happen organically like in this episode thaaanx

  5. But the so called wage gap doesn't take account of factors including hours, occupation choice, etc. Men work more hours on average and also seek higher paying jobs as opposed to women, this is not oppression yet the neo-liberal, pseudo "anti-establishment" propoganda machine loves to push this in order to give all women who are born "disadvantaged" an opportunity to have an advantage over the radical left's scapegoat known as the white cis male.

  6. In all honesty, I thought the virtual reality parts were decent, but the rest were pretty run of the mill. I think Dave Chapel was right in saying โ€œTrump is bad for comedyโ€, because everything about him has been over saturated and done since 2015. Iโ€™m all for liberal humor, but I wish there was more variety.

  7. , this is so freaking funny and sad at the same time๐Ÿคฃ๐Ÿคฃ๐Ÿคฃ๐Ÿคฃ๐Ÿ˜”๐Ÿ˜”๐Ÿ˜”๐Ÿ˜”๐Ÿ˜”

  8. I disagree with all hot takes except the gender thing seriously there's some that don't even make sense

  9. hyperbole is impossible with this cast of clowns, the reality is always so much worse every single day

  10. This is so funny how they say thing that you can get mad but you get argue just because they have issues

  11. The โ€œgender wage gapโ€ isnโ€™t an accurate measurement. It only takes into place the average wages for a job between men and women. It doesnโ€™t take into account the hours worked, the job worked, or the effort put in by the employee.

  12. You guys are a bunch of childish bunch of f**** idiots like seriously pick on the president make fun of them I'm sure he doesn't watch this s*** but still it's your president

  13. Joselico gracias ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ธ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ธ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ธ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ธ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ธ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ธ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ธ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ธ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ธ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ธ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ธ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ธ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ธ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ธ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ธ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ธ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ธ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ธ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ธ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ธ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ธ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ธ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ธ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ธ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ธ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ธ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ธ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ธ๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿ‘

  14. Amazing analysis/dissection of the current social consciousness๐Ÿ™๐Ÿฟ๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿฟ

  15. Iโ€™m so glad I voted for Trump I canโ€™t wait to do it again. Didnโ€™t really laugh maybe try something closer to reality.

  16. MAGA BABY!!!๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ธ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ธ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ธ๐Ÿ’ช๐Ÿ’ช๐Ÿ’ช

  17. You know how they are trying to show him all these papers and he is not signing them heโ€™s done way more work than Obamaโ€™s congress did but know they want government shutdowns and bla bla bla

  18. This is HYSTERICAL to ANYONE… Trump supporter or Not!!!๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ‘ Well done!!!

  19. what? you guys couldn't afford michio kaku for your fake scientist? any show can afford michio kaku, from cnn to c2cam

  20. This is actually shit. Like, disregarding all of the politics being shoved into it for satire sake, it's actually shit, there is hardly any comedic value here.

  21. Would be funny if it wasn't so obviously anti Trump. Less like satire and more like "DDDDRRRRUUUMMMMPPFFF"

  22. Sooo when does it get funny? Cause this is catered to kids, and if adults find this funny…. thats… depressing. Like 5 mins on Google show these opinons are tantrums. I guess disguised as jokes? Cause yea… word.

  23. You can't go around telling people the truth, people can't handle the truth. I'm Glade you're doing it so I don't have to. The irony in it all is funny an at the same time sad because it's true.

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